its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
