Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
