I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
