She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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