Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
