Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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