I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
