I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
