I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
whose parrot is this?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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