i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
