M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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