My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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