We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize