I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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