Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
