i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
