just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
