Just mADE A PArabola og urine
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
