I'll bet she douches with gravy.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
