can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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