its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
