the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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