He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I cockslap morals
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
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