how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I did not marry a roomba.
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