Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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