I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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