paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
