I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
