The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
