I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
