No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
