do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
