I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
