thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
