Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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