why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
This house was built for laser tag.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
We don't watch enough power rangers
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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