i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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