when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
