You made me cry and you don't even care
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
