Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
3pm strippers are depressing
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
