Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
