i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
