I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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