so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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