Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
im calling her cock vulture from now on
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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