sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
