I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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