what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
