It's Friday. Sex?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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