Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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